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 Post subject: Re: The "Problem" Thread.
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 12:25 am 
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 Post subject: Re: The "Problem" Thread.
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 1:31 am 
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 Post subject: Re: The "Problem" Thread.
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 2:52 am 
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First of all, this thread really blew up over night.
Secondly, I read most of the problems and noticed most of them are like my problems: out of reach.
So if I give myself advice, I'm giving you guys the same advice. So here's my advice:
Whenever a problem is not in your hands, but somewhere you cannot control it, just hope for the best. Since I moved to (country's name hidden for no reason whatsoever) my entire life has been chock-full of problems, and when one disappears, a new one is welcomed into my life. Another addition to this is that I just went through puberty, and I tried to resist all these problems. The only thing I will ever fear is anything that is beyond my control - and for me, that's everything. Trust me when I say I know how all of you feel. You have to do whatever you can to pass these times, and my best advice for situations like mine, is to just stay strong and wait for them to pass. I know these problems sting to a point where you cannot bear the malicious pain anymore, but staying strong is the only thing you can do. Do that, and in my eyes, you'll be above the rest. (Even though since I don't know you that probably has no value to you guys.)

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 Post subject: Re: The "Problem" Thread.
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 3:41 am 
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I have girlfriend right now, but i don't know wether i want to break-up or continue the relationship.
you see she's 16 and i'm nearly 21.
normaly that wouldn't be a problem, but the thing is... she's got the mind of a fourteen year old.
she's very childish and i'm not sure if i want to continue the relationship, but i don't want to hurt her feelings...
what the heck i'm i supossed to do?

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 Post subject: Re: The "Problem" Thread.
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 3:48 am 
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If you don't want to be with her, it'll hurt her less if you break it off now than it will if you wait.

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 Post subject: Re: The "Problem" Thread.
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 5:33 am 
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WarFire wrote:
I have girlfriend right now, but i don't know wether i want to break-up or continue the relationship.
you see she's 16 and i'm nearly 21.
normaly that wouldn't be a problem, but the thing is... she's got the mind of a fourteen year old.
she's very childish and i'm not sure if i want to continue the relationship, but i don't want to hurt her feelings...
what the heck i'm i supossed to do?


Well, first off, do you like her childish feature? Some people really like it when someone is childish, and others really depise it. After you think this through, move on to step two: other qualities. What do you like about her, what don't you like about her, and what are her unique traits? Chances are, you'll like more than you hate. Now, for the third step: why you began this relationship. This may as well be the most important question - why did you even begin a relationship with her? Was it her mind-set? Her psyique? After you complete step three, think to yourself a little while longer, absorbing all of the questions and answers, and everything you need to. After this is done, move on to the final step: the decision. After you answered all of these questions, you should already have a decision. If you decide to break up with her, your best option is to slow down your relationship, go on about two more dates, buy her at least one gift, and complete her expectations of you. Do take long though, about two weeks. After you've slowed it down, tell her why you want to break-up, and why you're both better off without each other. DO NOT start dating right after this though. If she sees you with another woman, she can get infuriated. Hope it helps.

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 Post subject: Re: The "Problem" Thread.
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 6:23 am 
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WarFire wrote:
i'm not sure if i want to continue the relationship, but i don't want to hurt her feelings...
what the heck i'm i supossed to do?

Remember: the relationship is about both of you. If you sacrifice yourself to avoid hurting her, then you make it about her - and if she's really as childish as you say she is, or if she's just a manipulative silly goose, she'll use that to her advantage. That's a pretty short road to an abusive and exploitive relationship. On the other hand, breaking it off with her suddenly will make her upset, and since you don't want to hurt her feelings... yeah. I'd recommend talking about the problems you're having with her and seeing what you want to do after you've done that; talking can't hurt unless she's really childish.
Sounds cheesy, but communication is the keystone of a successful relationship.

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 Post subject: Re: The "Problem" Thread.
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 6:25 am 
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Eating: FEWD
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Playing: Elite Beat Agents... AND ITS KICKING MY ASS!!
i guess that's true...
thanks delph...

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